Member-only story
Just Here for the Sex & Other Assumptions about Dating Non Monogamous People
Debunking assumptions about non monogamy one date at a time
One of the things I have noticed is that there are lots of misconceptions about dating non monogamous people and what they might be looking for. After going out on a number of dates, I have been surprised by the number of times I have had to do some myth-busting about non monogamy. Here’s what my dates often assume about non monogamous people like me:
Myth 1: Something is wrong with my marriage
The most common misconception is that there is something very wrong with my marriage. Like, that my spouse can’t satisfy me and I am looking for satisfaction elsewhere. A shocking number of my first dates are spent answering questions about whether my husband can get it up. (He can, no problem in that department I assure you).
Other dates assume I am on Tinder because I am on the brink of divorce and I am looking to find a replacement husband. Many don’t really believe me when I assure them that my husband and I are still in fact in love. For some dates, it is even harder for them to believe that being on Tinder is not a secret I keep from my husband.
“I am not using non monogamy as a code-word for cheating.”
