I brought a toothbrush for nothing?!

A little story about giving someone too many chances

Liz Sinclair

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Photo by Emmeline T. on Unsplash

I have been non monogamous for about four years and dated a number of men. I thought I had experienced my fair share of dating mishaps over the years, but I never thought I would experience the triple-whammy of being catfished, disregarded and booted out of a bed as soon as sex was over all by the same man. But it happened to me and I did not like it. What happened you ask? Let’s go back a couple of months…

I met Mike (this is obviously a pseudonym, as much as I am not happy with him I do feel like I can’t be quite so vindictive as to use his real name) on an online dating app that touts itself as being “for the open-minded to meet the like-minded”. His bio stood out from the usual unicorn-seekers with its sensitivity and openness. He described himself as a 52 year old non monogamous, polyamorous, body-worker and therapist who was looking for tantric, ongoing and deep connections. I was smitten from the start. We matched and started to chat.

To my dismay, after a couple of messages back and forth over the next few days, I noticed that our distance from each other, which was shown on the app, had gone from 5 miles to 300 miles. As it turned out, we had matched when we were both visiting a big city, but our respective homes were 150 miles + in…

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Liz Sinclair

Ordinary, middle-aged, university educated, working mother of three in a long-term loving marriage. Oh, and also non monogamous.