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Messy and Memorable: My Non-Monogamous Journey to Self-Acceptance in the Bedroom
What embarrassing sexual experiences taught me about self-compassion
Before my husband and I ventured into the realm of non-monogamy, my sexual history was nothing short of limited. In fact, it was extremely limited. I met my husband when I was 18, and before him, I had only dabbled in a few shorter relationships, never venturing beyond second base. He was my first love and remained my only partner for over 25 years. Together, we crafted a sexual relationship that felt safe, comfortable, loving, and mostly satisfying. Our intimacy was so intuitive that we rarely needed to discuss it — things just flowed effortlessly. We knew each other’s desires, the right buttons to push, and our comfort zones, which allowed us to skip the awkward conversations and dive straight into the action.
However, as we decided to open up our relationship in our forties, I couldn’t help but wonder if there was more to explore beyond our well-worn routine. While I cherished the connection with my husband, the prospect of experiencing intimacy with other men piqued my curiosity. I felt like a sexual explorer, venturing into uncharted territory. Would these new experiences be similar to what I’d known for so long, or would I uncover an entirely different world?